Messy Rooms and Cell Phones; How Can One Possibly Be Related to the Other?

Today I cleaned my girls' room for the umpteenth time.  They simply cannot seem to do it themselves (now I know this not to be true they are perfectly capable children who refuse to conform to my insidious standards).  

But that is neither here nor there. Today I cleaned it.  I spent hours picking up trash that was not mine, folding clothes that did not belong to me and vacuuming dust bunnies I did not create.  I cleaned the girls' room; but not entirely.  I'm giving them an after school chore list.  A little treat to make their day. 

You see Middle wants a cell phone.  Like really bad.  Like everybody else has one and how can I be so cruel as to not provide her with one of life's most basic necessities.  

Only I don't see it that way.  A cell phone is not a right it's a privilege; a privilege to be earned.  And earn it she must.  We've told her time and time again -- you can get a cell phone.  All you have to do is clean your room and keep it clean for a month.  One month.  That's it.  

Has she done that?  Oh no.  She doesn't understand why we would ask such a thing of her.  Why do I care if her room is clean?  It's her room after all.  

Hmmm -- let's see.  So she can find the clothes she owns but claims she doesn't have.  So she can find her homework when it's due.  So she can live a life void of salmonella and E. Coli and other duplicitous organisms.  So she can exit the building in case of a fire or other emergency.  The list goes on and on. 

But the basic gist of the matter is a clean room is proof that she cares; that she respects herself and her material possessions.  After all why in the world would I a) purchase a cell phone and b) sign up for a long term commitment for an object that is going to be tossed on the floor and stomped on?  Or washed on accident?  Or left behind in school cafeteria?  Why indeed.  

A cell phone is a privilege.  One for those mature enough to handle the responsibility.  And if said maturity never appears?  Oh well.  I grew up without a cell phone (and still don't have one today).  I turned out okay.  

Do you think me horrifically mean?  

xo.