Showing posts with label children. Show all posts
Showing posts with label children. Show all posts

Wednesday, March 30, 2011

The Bank of Peculiar (or finances for kids)


My son was recently tossed into the real world of money; a sort of sink or swim scenario. He and his dad *love* thrifting. They especially adore vintage clothing. But they've found that in order to support their habit they must sell some of what they buy (i.e. mama put the kibosh on spending family money that was, say, slated to pay the mortgage.)

So the boy delved into Ebay and now also has his own Etsy shop. I *love* this. He's learning photography, writing, negotiating and financial management. Talk about real world schooling.

This week he wanted to make a purchase. Thus he took money from his bank account bringing the balance below that magical twenty-five dollar mark.

Mama warned him. Mama said there would be penalties -- maintenance fees and what not. The boy, in his wisdom, assured Mama he would put the money back in a few short days and the bank would be fine with that. Mama tried to explain that banks are not benevolent entities; they are money making machines that will "getcha" at every opportunity (sad but oh so true).

And Mama was right. The boy was hit with a maintenance fee and a subsequent overdraft fee. Needless to say he was not pleased. I withheld the "I told you so" and he learned a good life lesson.

Now I got to thinking. The girls really ought to be learning money management as well. I'm not sure they're ready for the big time and the big bad banks. But they are ready to begin nonetheless. So we opened checking accounts at the Bank of Peculiar; complete with checkbooks and registers. The checks were created on photoshop and contain graphics to appeal to their individual tastes. As you can see Little is a die hard Scooby Doo fan. We may take it one step further and sew our own checkbook covers (stay tuned).

Little had some of her own money and made an initial deposit. Middle had no cash but was thrilled to discover the tooth fairy now had direct deposit capabilities. When the girls want something (say frozen yogurt after school) they will fill out a check. Mama or Papa will pay for the actual item and the amount will be withdrawn from their account.

We are creating a list of household jobs that will be available should the children want to earn additional income. Their "salary" will be deposited into their accounts.

We discussed that, for now, The Bank of Peculiar is a kind and loving bank. However, there may be fees in the future -- say for printing checks or low balances. We also discussed that high balance accounts may be able to earn interest. I want this to be a realistic learning experience; both good and bad. But in the beginning I am simply hoping to peak their interest. So far so good.


XO.





Wednesday, January 7, 2009

Learning Gratefulness


Housing prices continue to fall. Household expenses are increasing while annual income is decreasing. This economic recession continues it’s negative spiral with no end in sight. And there is no better time to be grateful. What? Grateful? Absolutely!

Now is the time to appreciate all that we do have - from the roof over our heads to the scent of a fresh-peeled orange. Given the right framework most lives are truly abundant.

When you are grateful fear disappears and abundance appears
Anthony Robbins

Abundance is not the possession of material objects. Instead abundance is a state of mind, a meditation of daily gratitude. And this meditation can make you happy. A 2003 study* by Emmons and McCullough showed that .. “the gratitude-outlook groups exhibited heightened well-being.” These groups were more optimistic about their future, felt better about their lives and exercised more; all a direct result of gratitude.

Furthermore a 2008 study* by Froh, Sefick and Emmons showed adolescents who practiced gratefulness had ... “enhanced optimism, [and] life satisfaction.” Is this not what every parent wants?

But here’s the problem. My children do not practice daily gratitude. They do not see the abundance before them. Rather each day arrives with a litany of complaints (could mom’s cooking be any more boring!).

This morning I became so frustrated with my eight-year-old’s attitude I threatened to make her sleep in the garage (the theory being she would then appreciate the roof over her head even if said roof included sharing a room with her sister).

Short of shoving my kids out in the cold I am at a loss. I want to teach my children gratefulness and thus gift them with truly joyful life. But what’s a parent to do?

Here are some ideas:

1) Start a thankfulness tree. Have each family member make leaves of gratitude to hang on the tree. Periodically change the leaves on your tree and take time to sit down and pour over all the things you have to be thankful for.

2) Volunteer for those less fortunate (a soup kitchen, a nursing home, a pet shelter, etc). Discuss how you and your children could improve these people’s lives.

3)Leave Hope Notes scattered about your town to brighten someone’s day.

4) Lead by example; take the time to find beauty in each day and share this beauty with your children.

5) Have Earth Hour once a week. Learn how people lived before the creation of all our modern conveniences.

6) Routinely donate toys to those less fortunate.

7) Keep a daily gratitude journal with your kids. Nightly write five things for which you are grateful.

8) Turn off the television and monitor computer use. Eliminate those flashy ads which vie for our kids’ purchasing power and simultaneously diminish their self-worth.

Gratefulness is a skill, a skill that can be learned. And the benefits of daily gratitude can be seen in as little as three weeks. Three weeks! A mere 21-days to a happier healthier child and happier healthier family. What’s not to lose?

+++++++++++++++

Today I'm grateful for warm breezy winter days, hot showers, the scent of a lemon in the disposal and an invite to a knitting group.

What are you grateful for?
___________________________________________________________________

*Emmons, R.A., McCullough, M.E. (2003). Counting blessings versus burdens: An experimental investigation of gratitude and subjective well-being in daily life. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 84(2), 377-389.

*Froh, J.J., Sefick, W.J., Emmons, R.A. (2008). Counting blessings in early adolescents: An experimental study in gratitude and subjective well-being. Journal of School Psychology, 46, 213-233.

Wednesday, November 12, 2008

Teaching Children Fiscal Responsibility



My husband and I have not always been responsible with money. In our early twenties, despite an obvious lack of money, we’d determined it grew on trees. Booted from our respective nests we lived as if mom and pop were still footing the bills. Essentially we ate our way out of an early retirement by putting each and every mediocre meal on credit. Then we had a baby and I simultaneously started veterinary school. We couldn’t pay our bills - not even the minimum payments. And there were diapers and childcare and that pesky government who insisted we pay 1099 taxes. We were not okay.

We contacted Consumer Credit Counseling Services and made drastic changes to our lifestyle. We became a one car family; which I used to commute to school leaving the boys high and dry. My husband biked our son to daycare and anywhere else he needed to go. We did not have cell phones. We canceled our cable service. We bought pre-paid calling cards. We did not eat out. We did not go on vacation and we generally did not spend money on anything but the bills. Bit-by-bit we climbed out of that deep dark cavern of debt and vowed to never go spelunking again.

Now the economy is slowing. And regular readers know we are once again taking steps to cut back our lifestyle; not because we are financially down trodden but because we don’t want to be. And truth-be-told we could stand to have a larger emergency cushion--just in case I go and say switch careers or do something equally risky.

Christmas will be financed by selling stuff on Ebay. We are eating solely at home (last night I had a can of tuna and a can of garbanzo beans - yum!). Most household items are garage sale or thrift store finds. I rely on the Goodwill to outfit my children (read not trendy).

And other than my obvious lack of fashion acumen what does this have to do with the children? Everything. We have been using this economic slowdown as a springboard to teach our kids fiscal responsibility. When we go shopping we compare prices. We discuss which items are a better deal (the large container for x price or two smaller containers for y price). At garage sales we give the kids a budget (typically a dollar or two). The kids are free to spend this money at their will so long as they do the math themselves (though we do offer the four-year-old some mathematical assistance). We talk about budgeting, saving, investing and financial responsibility. And we thought things were going well ...

Then my daughter came home from school with a brilliant plan. It seems her friend, who is essentially homeless and whose family bounces from hotel to hotel, has a Family Access Network Advocate. This is a cool thing. Advocates bring clothes and notebooks and colored pencils - for free! Middle Sis got to experience this spirit of getting first hand because the advocate allowed to her tag along to her friend's session. Middle sis even got a free notebook. And she formulated a plan ...

You see, if she had an advocate of her very own then I wouldn't have to complain about her growing out of her clothes and we’d have access to all the pens we could ever write with. Clearly this is an excellent deal.

Aaaack! We sat Sis down. We attempted to explain “... We are thrilled there are advocates. Your friend, by no fault of her own, does not have an ideal family life. They are struggling. And she benefits greatly from these free items. Hopefully, with this assistance, she can make a better life for herself. But you, Sister, do not live the kind of life requiring an advocate. You don’t want the kind of life that would make an advocate necessary. Yes, free is good. The right kind of free. The if you aren’t going to use that and were just going to throw it out kind of free is excellent. It’s fiscally and environmentally responsible. However a family advocate not the kind of free you want. That kind of free is reserved for people who really truly need it.”

She looked thoughtful. We thought she understood. I WANT AN ADVOCATE!

Her father tried a different approach, “I can beat the living daylights out of you and then you could call the police. I’ll bet they’ll give you an advocate then!”

Sis looked at her father with a smirk, “No,” she said in a silly Daddy Trix are for kids tone, “that’s not how you get an advocate. I’ll just tell them you only buy me clothes from the Goodwill.”

Clearly there is still much work to do, “...and miles to go before I sleep, and miles to go before I sleep.”

Thursday, June 12, 2008

Ah, Young Love...



My youngest daughter has taken quite a liking to my son's friends. She has several little crushes on these "older" boys. One of the boys, Davis, recently sang in a school choir concert. The baby was enamored. Her sister, who is eight, helped her to compose a poem to Davis; perfect fodder for homecoming dates. We will, without a doubt, mortify our children during their teenage years.

Happy Love Thursday!